The Header

This morning I woke up with a million things on my mind and to tell you the truth, the thought of it all stressed me out, and right away I was already looking ahead at my day with a sort of dread. There were things waiting to get checked off the "to do" list, so I started in on them full steam ahead, and the tyranny of the urgent consumed me. You know when you're reading along in a book and you see a small number beside a word, you go down to the bottom of the page, find that number and voila, there's a little footnote to explain that word or sentence. A reference. It's always helpful, but very minute and not actually part of the main document. That's God in my day sometimes. An, "oh yeah, and this is where I squeeze God into my life" kind of note. Right in the middle of all of that, God told me to stop and spend some time with him, and I have to admit, this is the last thing I wanted to do. I was telling God, "Oh God, do I hafta? I've got a million things to do today and this is really going to slow me down." But I sat down to spend time with my God. And as I was praying, the world I was just consumed in started to fade. The urgent didn't seem so urgent anymore and God's agenda which was farthest from my mind a minute ago came to the forefront.

The God of the Bible is certainly not a footnote. He is the header in our life's story. He is the main idea, the bottom line, the meat and potatoes, the essence, the conclusion and the crux. He is the nitty-gritty. He is the nuts and bolts. Deuteronomy 4:24 says He is a consuming fire. In John 15:5, Jesus says, I am the vine; you are the branches . . . apart from me you can do nothing." He is the bread of life (John 6:35). He is the light of the world (John 8:12). He is the way, the truth and the life (John 14:6). He is our life source. HE IS! Romans 11:36 says, "For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be glory forever! Amen."

That said, the whole of what it means to follow Jesus can be summed up in just one verse, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind; and love your neighbor as yourself . . . do this and you will live (Luke 10:27-28). We are to be consumed in God and his purpose to show his love to others. Try writing that in your daily planner each day. It changes your schedule just a bit, doesn't it? I know, there are still those day to day chores and troubles we all have to deal with, but it would keep us from getting buried in those things. Instead, be buried in Jesus Christ. "Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God" (Col. 3:2-3). It is like entering another reality. You're in the world, but not consumed by it.

When I plug into my life source (Jesus Christ), I am filled with peace and joy, and my day doesn't seem so daunting after all. In fact, I look forward to the adventure. It makes me think of that old hymn,

"Turn your eyes upon Jesus. Look full in his wonderful face, and the things of earth will grow strangely dim in the light of his glory and grace."

This is what God has been teaching me. What has he been teaching you?

Rain

I love this little video by Rob Bell. Rain always comes . . . in our lives. It just does. Its a fact. But atleast we know the Lord is near and that He can see the end and knows the way out.

This Is All That I Have

I was having coffee with a friend just recently. She was looking for some answers to relationship issues she is having. So I was thinking of what I could say to encourage her. I am not in the least bit an expert on this. Maybe I could suggest one of those self help books. I have read my fair share of them, mostly christian ones. You know, the ones that have a seven step process to wedded bliss and the ones that tell you ___ + ___ = the perfect life (you can fill in the blanks). The formula ones. Or the ones that give you a list of rules to follow and then everything will turn out alright. To be honest, I have met people who are quite good at following rules, lists and formulas and some of them are jerks. And those books usually just frustrate me more than anything. I finish the book determined to "get it right this time" and then mess up big time soon after and I am back to square one. And on top of that, I eventually forget what I have read and must continually relearn things. Maybe a marriage seminar or retreat? I come away from them so encouraged, but to tell you the truth, as soon as I get home and into the schedule, I slip right back into former ways. Plus, they are really expensive! Maybe I could tell her that she needs to go to church more, listen to hymn cds in the car and find more Christian friends who also listen to hymn cds in the car . . . no, not that either because I don't even listen to hymn cds in the car. So where can she find answers? Are there any answers or are we all just swirling around in confusion only achieving success by pure luck?

The only thing I could come up with worth telling her about is the only thing that has ever brought any transformation in my life . . . that being my relationship with the living God and Creator of all things including me (a.k.a Jesus Christ). The one who came to heal the broken hearted and set the captives free (Isa. 61:1). I'm not talking about going to church and reading the Bible. That would be like saying I'm best buds with Abe Lincoln because I visited his house and read his biography. No, I'm talking about an actual day-to-day relationship with Jesus Christ. He talks to me, I talk to him. Sounds crazy, I know. But when he speaks truth into my life, all of the sudden a light goes on and I am forever set free from that struggle.

I am the light of the world. If you follow me, you won't have to walk in darkness, because you will have the light that leads to life. ~Jesus (John 8:12 NLT)

I don't know of anyone else who can do that, so just maybe the answers aren't in a formula or in a set of rules or "religion" and God actually created us to be relational to have our needs met by closeness with him. Just maybe this Jesus is a whole lot bigger than we think and just maybe we can depend him to get us through life.

Searching for Significance

I've been having significance issues lately and I've been doing all kinds of things to try to fix the problem. I've been praying for direction and clarity, I've been trying to get more involved at church, I've been thinking through career paths, I've been looking at grad schools and then prayed some more and all I got was a bunch of road blocks and one answer from God, "Spend more time with me." This was NOT the answer I had in mind. So I completely ignored God and kept striving on my own (*side note: As I look back over all the wonderful things in my life, I have never had to strive for any of them, so what made me think I would need to start now?). And again, all I got was more road blocks and one answer from God, "Spend more time with me." This whole "ignoring God" thing went on for a while and the frustration mounted. I have even lost sleep over this. I kind of thought God's answer was beside the point, but in my heart I knew that it WAS the point. So recently I have given in to God and started spending more time with him and all the sudden I have more direction and peace than I've had for months! Then I came across John 12:43,

For they loved praise from men more than praise from God.

And it hit me that my striving was due to my perceived need for praise from people. Erwin McManus in "Wide Awake" says it like this:

God glorifies himself and finds the greatest honor from our lives when we are willing to fail in the eyes of others simply by doing what is right even if it means losing our perceived value in the world. Faith is not measured by success . . . would you choose success in the eyes of others or failure that brings your life its greatest meaning? Sometimes we hesitate to choose the more difficult path even when we know it leads us to the life we were born to live.

I was searching for significance in all the wrong places. In short, significance and success defined by our culture is vain and empty. It will neither satisfy nor give us the peace that we are all looking for. But Christ will. It is such a huge relief to not be under the pressure of the world. This song by Tenth Avenue North says it well and brings me to tears when I hear it.

On Discipline

Ok, now I really am on my little soapbox, but I have been thinking on this lately. I believe children are a wonderful gift from God, but also a great responsibility entrusted to us who require A LOT of time and energy. That said, the longer I have been a parent, the more I realize that you cannot be lazy and be a good parent. I see so many children who are terrors and it weighs heavy on me. I am sad for the children much more than I am sad for their parents. They are not going to be able to live life to its fullest if they are focused only on themselves. Discipline is not a way of controlling a child so parents can have an easier life, it is setting our precious gifts from God up for success in life. All of life is about serving others and when children are taught that they are the center of the universe and parents and others are there to serve them, they will be rudely awakened when they get older and enter the workforce, and it will be painful for them. I discipline because I love my daughter intensely. I want to set her up with truth and character. Cute little sins now turn into big ugly ones later and it is much easier for her to learn the lessons now. But my aim is not to change outward actions (that is just legalism). My aim is her heart. Sorry to get all preachy on you. This is what I woke up thinking about this morning.

Bread for Thought

I love bread. My mom used to laugh at me when I was little because almost every night I would ask if I could please just have one piece of bread and some water before bed. She said I sounded like a refugee. You have no idea how disappointed I was when I found out bread isn't all that good for you, at least eating it at the rate I was. Well my refugee days are over, but I've moved on to bigger and better things . . . namely Panera Bread. It is one of my favorite spots. Ask my husband who has had to endure eating with me at this "chic restaurant" (as he calls it) for the past 6 years. He would much rather eat some steak, but is instead reduced to froo-froo soups, salads, and sammies which of course come with a steaming hot mouthwatering loaf of fresh baked bread. Speaking of bread, I've been ruminating on John 6:34,

Then Jesus declared, "I am the bread of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry, and he who believes in me will never be thirsty . . ."

This naturally caught my attention and made made me think. Bread in those times was the sustenance of life. It was essential for survival, not a carb no-no like our current culture. There was no appetizer, main course and desert, it was just bread and maybe some wine to drink. That's it kids! That's what's for dinner! Bread gives satisfaction, life and energy (oh baby does it ever. Just try not eating for a couple days). Of course bread is a metaphor. Jesus is the bread of life because He brings us life through faith in Him! A life that is radically changed into something better than you could ever ask for or imagine. He is salvation to those who want it. What is your salvation? We all have one. Is it success? Is it money? Notoriety? Education? Family or friends? Is it that house with a white picket fence? Anything other than the true life-giving bread from heaven is like eating dirt. It doesn't taste good (unless you don't know any better, but that is a whole other topic), diminishes the quality of your life and will not satisfy. Do you want a life lived fully with freedom and peace, adventure and purpose? Feast on the delectable, super tasty bread from heaven, Jesus Christ, and you will never hunger again.

. . . I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. John 10:10

Munch on that for a bit and in the meantime, I'm headed to Panera Bread!

Christmas Jesus Freak

Maybe its the fact that I am a mom now and we are thinking through what we want to communicate to Mali and forming family traditions, or maybe its the fact I am just becoming more aware of a world in need, but I have all of the sudden become a sort of Christmas Jesus Freak. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not out on the streets of Tampa clad in John 3:16 with a megaphone shouting to passer-byers to "repent." I'm just passionate about making Christmas about why it originally began in the first place: the birth of Jesus Christ "who came to save his people from their sins." (Matt. 1:21)

This is how God showed His love among us: He sent His one and only Son into the world that we might live through Him. I John 4:9 NIV

That said, I found this wonderful little DVD that tells the true Christmas story, so I plan on buying it for all the little ones in my life. Christmas is not about materialism, but about blessing someone's socks off! Last year, our pastor told us that the average family spends $1,000 on Christmas gifts each year (yikes, that's a lot for an average), so he challenged us to spend half of what we normally spend, save a fourth and give away the remaining fourth. So that is what our church did and we sent thousands of dollars to build wells in Africa so the people there could have clean water to drink. That is what Christmas is all about.

St. Maurice

Have you ever heard about a Roman military commander named Maurice? Yeah, neither had I until just yesterday when I happened to read about him. You know Christ's prayer that we as Christians "be in the world, but not of it?" Maurice took this to a whole new level. Back when the Roman Empire ruled the world and Christians were persecuted, Maurice was given orders to direct a persecution of Christians. Instead, Maurice handed his insignia to his assistant so he could join the Christians and be killed as a fellow believer. This took place in the Rhone valley in Switzerland under the mountains of the Dents du Midi. It is for him that the town of St. Maurice is now named. Wow, what strong faith he had! I want to be like that.

A Nice Little Life

John Eldredge, in his book, Walking With God, says this . . .

I want two things that are mutually opposed--I want to live a nice little life, and I want to play an important role in God’s kingdom. And it’s in those times that I am trying to live a nice little life that I make decisions and choices that cause me in small and subtle ways to live outside of Jesus. The shepherd is headed one direction, and I am headed another. Not some flagrant sin—that’s too easy to recognize. Instead, I’m simply wandering off looking for the pasture I deem best. I don’t even think to ask God about it. A very dangerous way of thinking. As Christians we don’t get to live a 'normal' life, and accepting that fact in all the details of our lives is what allows us to remain in Jesus.

When I read this, it really irked me. . . because it is true and truth sheds light on the dark places in our lives. This is my struggle. Sometimes I want this nice little life. You know, the kind that doesn't involve too much pain or sacrifice. The kind that is comfortable and secure. The kind that comes with things, like a nice house, nice vacations, nice "issue-free" people in my life so I don't have to carry other's burdens, nice things like that (not that these things are necessarily harmful, but they can be if they are the focus). But then I also want to live passionately for Christ. I know that my life is not my own, but Christ's.

For you have died and your life is hidden with Christ in God. Col. 3:2-3

I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me . . . Gal. 2:20

And in the end, I really don't want a nice little life, because there is no such thing. It is a lie from the evil one. There is only the adventurous life found in Jesus or a meaningless, selfish life. Sounds harsh, I know, but it is true.

Choosing Tragedy Over Safety

This is a great quote I just recently came across . . .

To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries, avoid all entanglements, lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket -safe, dark, motionless, airless - it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. The alternative to tragedy is damnation. The only place you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is Hell. ~C.S. Lewis

I've Changed

I've changed and I didn't really even realize it. Yesterday, I turned on a Christian radio station I used to like to listen to and agreed with mostly, but I haven't listened to it in a couple years. I was listening for awhile and suddenly realized I didn't agree with this station anymore. The couple programs I listened to painted the picture of Christianity far too negative. It made me not want to be a follower of Jesus. It seemed complicated and burdensome to be a Christain. The whole of Christianity was painted as constantly being worried about sin, falling into it, or trying to stay out of it. Wow, that is not it at all! In fact, that is just the opposite. Christ has made me free from all that and sees me as His precious child without sin (through His grace and Spirit). Being a follower of Christ means being free, declared righteous, not bound by a legalistic system of checks and balances. Check out Galatians 3! Condemnation causes fear and comes from the evil one, but Jesus sets us free and makes our lives bright! The funny thing is I kept listening awhile. I think because I was glad to learn that I've changed.

Jesus at Adventure Island

I've been reading a book entitled Walking with God, by John Eldredge. In it, he encourages us to include God in our day-to-day mundane lives, in every little detail and to really listen to Him (our schedules, small daily decisions, etc.). I thought about this and why not? I mean God wants to truly lead us, and our lives would be a whole lot easier if we let Him. So Adrian and I have been trying this lately. Just a couple weeks ago, we asked Him if we should go to the beach with friends that we've been trying to get together with for ages or stay home to mow a neighbor's lawn who just had a baby. God told us to stay and cut the grass. Although I was glad to help our neighbors, I fretted about the decision for the next week because I felt we had let our friends down and knowing how busy everyone's schedule is, thought the opportunity had completely passed until next summer. It turns out our friends had gone to the beach anyway, had a blast and asked if we wanted to go with them the next weekend. We were so excited, God worked everything out.
Last week, we decided to take Mali to Adventure Island Water Park (yep, we asked God first and he said we should go) and on the way there I was fretting about the fact that we would have to pay for parking and we were only going to be there a few hours. I don't know why I was fretting, but I was. I hate paying $10 to park for 3 hours. So, I prayed that we wouldn't have to pay for parking (it seemed like a silly prayer, but I did it anyways. It felt good to cast my worry on Him). So we pull into the park and the parking booth attendant leans over and says, "Go on ahead, you guys are good to go." I couldn't believe it! Free parking, just like I asked. I was thinking maybe I should ask about our mortgage next . . . haha, no, God is not a genie, but the point of all this is, life is so much easier and more worry-free when we live in God's schedule rather than drag Him along with our schedule. "My sheep listen to my voice; I know them and they follow me." John 10:27 (NLT)